Day thirty six in London

I haven't updated in a while so I figured I would write at least something to let everyone know that I'm still alive.

I haven't been doing very much lately, which I know is a total waste of an awesome opportunity but I try to reserve my traveling for the weekends since I go to school all week.

I haven't given up on England completely. There are a lot of things here that I love, and there are things here that are different and frustrate me. There are aspects of the culture that I find interesting, and other aspects that I sometimes think are questionable and rude. It’s basically to be expected, and I wouldn’t blame another country for being different from what I am used to.

I think what I’m getting out of this trip is different from what most people here will come home with. Some people are here for school and to have something good to put on their resumes, some people are here to live the life and soak up the culture, some people are here to party, some people are here to go pub hopping and get stupid drunk every night. Whatever reasons the people here have for coming to England for this semester I don’t hold against them, because they’re doing what makes them happy.

What I think I’m getting out of this trip more than seeing Stonehenge, hiking the cliffs of Dover, taking a train ride to Paris, buying European clothes, tasting different ethnic foods and all of that is basically just taking the next step in life and learning to live on my own and provide for myself, finally. I’m finally doing it.

My diet though? Holy crap, it’s borderline appalling at times, haha. When me and Jeff first arrived here we had a mindset that we were going to pinch every penny when it came to food and the basic necessities that keep us comfortable, so we would stock up on nothing but chips, hot dogs, and canned ravioli. I’m five weeks into this trip and I’m going crazy sometimes from eating the same things. I try to go food shopping frequently and buy different things to break up the monotony of the poor college kid diet. Today I bought a couple English pasties which are basically the first form of hot pockets, created in the medieval ages as a way of keeping perishable foods fresh for longer periods of time. It’s just meat, potatoes and whatever other ingredients baked inside what kind of looks like a croissant, and they’re really good. They’re kind of like the equivalent to foods you find at the county fair or whatever. I also bought pasta, strawberries and organic apple/cranberry juice. It rules.

I don’t really eat out much for the fact that a lot of places around here are pricey, and when I want to eat out I’m usually doing it alone because Jeff doesn’t really like much of the ethnic foods. I did however eat at this place called the Giraffe the other day which is right outside the apartment building I’m staying in. It’s kind of an African themed café with a wide range of dishes to choose from. I had some turkey enchiladas with chorizo sausage, black beans, guacamole and pine nuts which were amazing. I need to go there more often.

I’ve been wrestling with some issues lately with the living situation I have here and I’m trying my best to stay neutral and find equal ground. Usually my way of addressing problems is to sit tight and just wait it out, but I’m confronted by it almost every day and I have no choice but to speak up about it. I feel like sometimes I’m the one to blame so I’m trying to change my attitude towards some of the things here and maybe things will go back to normal when I get home, and possibly just take a break for a while and boost my confidence and self esteem back up. Sorry this all sounds so vague. My mind is all over the place and it’s hard to get my thoughts organized.

I have another 42 days left here which is kind of surprising because it feels like time is flying by... well, sort of. I guess it helps when London is five hours ahead of the eastern United States. I’m pretty sure that I’m not going to see everything here that I should be seeing and I’ve come to terms with that, but that’s why later in life I’m going to try my hardest to come back here with maybe a small group of people and probably have a lot more fun. Right now, being in London is a vacation and isn’t at the same time. I’m going to school four days a week which I haven’t done in almost a year and a half, I have exams and term papers to stress over, and on top of that I have to keep the refrigerator somewhat full and keep this god awful place clean. (I also discovered that our apartment is the smallest apartment in the whole building. We totally got screwed over.) If and when I do come back here, my focus will be on England and not thinking about school, work, missing home, missing friends and so on. Right now it’s more or less getting what I need to get done and that’s it, as unfortunate as it sounds. I’ll be back to redeem my self someday.

Well, I think I’m all out of things to say for right now. I was supposed to go to Stonehenge tomorrow but my art teacher decided to have a makeup day because she decided to skip out on class last week. Thanks, bitch. Hopefully I get so sleep in sometime this weekend, then study for my exams which are going to be really tough.

Bye bye for now. I miss you all.

<3